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Book (TBFGK)
Page by page (79a)
Panel by panel (79a:1)

Page Info [edit]

Turn Number:6 AW
Side's Turn:Gobwin Knob

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TBFGK 79a.jpg
TBFGK 80.jpg

Panels: 2
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Panel 1

Four golems are standing in front of a wall of lines, as in a police lineup. The first is in the form of a small, thin, grey man, with a mustache and goatee, dressed in a collared shirt with widening sleeves. Its hands seem too large for its body. The next appears to have been graffitied or tie-dyed, and has the form of a woman with an afro, a ruffled shirt, and possibly wearing a cape of some sort. The third is brown colored and much wider than the other two, with the appearance of a muscular man in a sleeveless undershirt. The final golem is made of metal, and is the largest of all, bearing a thick beard and spikes on its knees, as well as rings of spikes at its shoulders and wrists. It seems to be screaming, and holds its hands together above its head, little fingers extended, as if too indicate that it has "too much rock for one hand." None of the golems have noses.[edit]
(There is no text in this panel.) [edit]

Panel 2

The right-hand page of an eyebook, mostly full of plain text but also including a Hamstard cartoon in the center right.[edit]

Left Sizemore in the tunnels with his golems. He's blocking off passageways, making a maze of dead ends, pitfalls, deadfalls, ambuscades, etc. He's really happy to have something new to do.

Took me four hours to climb back up to ground level and then up the Tower. Can't describe my legs. Maybe "boop × ow ^10"

Hamstard: I can describe your legs. How 'bout, "a bathtub full of Ricotta cheese crammed into two condoms?"

Some stuff he said stuck with me. Gobwins broke their alliance - what alliance? Aha. They are not our troops per se. Some sides have no capital, no cities, no royals - gobwins, marbits, witches, elf brands, others. Have their own treasuries, form long semi-permanent alliances.

Tribal affiliations seem pointless, like a cultural thing I think. But Royalty is different. Royal and noble units have slightly stronger stats, and level faster. Cities ruled by Royals pop nobles (and more Royals). Royal empires split off sometimes into new sides. Royals claim to trace their lineage to days of Titans.

This is what they are so anal about. It's a "divine mandate" to rule. When a non-royal gets powerful, the Royals like to gang up on him.

But okay, the Tool said he had a divine mandate too. But when danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled...[1]

So does he? Does anybody? Is this a real holy war, or just a bunch of deluded boopholes croaking each other? Too fine a distinction?


  1. ^ A reference to Sir Robin the Not-Quite-So-Brave-As-Sir-Lancelot in Monty Python and the Holy Grail.