Faq (side)

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Livery of the Kingdom of Faq

Faq redirects here. For other uses, see Faq (disambiguation)

Proposed Canon

TBFGK 82.jpg

The Kingdom of Faq is a Capital Side in Erfworld. It was sacked by Stanley,[1] but has been rebuilt by Queen Jillian using funds provided by Transylvito.[2] It is now a member of the Royal Crown Coalition II. Count Vinny Doombats was the liaison between Faq and Transylvito and Jillian's lover.[3]; he has since become Chief Warlord of Transylvito and broken that alliance. Jillian has formed a secret alliance with Charlie who helped arrange for the Western Giants to become Faq's Natural Allies.[4] Since the fall of Unaroyal, Don King sent substantial resources to Faq at the cost of his own Kingdom, leaving its own borders vulnerable and repeatedly invaded against the objections of his Chief Warlord Caesar Borgata.[5] This dispute ultimately cost Don his life and his throne and led to the Faq-Transylvito war.

Faq consists of a Capital of the same name with two subordinate cities.[6] It also has significant natural resources available as farms and mines. Faq's cities can produce Royals, Noble Warlords, Knights, Infantry, Gwiffons and Megalogwiffs. The rate at which new units are being produced had been substantially increased by Vanna.[7]

Faq is surrounded with mountains on all sides.[8] Some tunnels pass through these mountains. Much of the mountain terrain is of the "Impassable Mountain" variety[9] which provides a small number of choke points; this makes it much easier to defend Faq against a numerically superior army. There is at least one pass through the mountains, called the Faq Gap.[10] A river flows through the Kingdom of Faq.[11]

King Banhammer was the last Ruler of Faq prior to its fall. Jillian Zamussels was his daughter and a heir to the throne.

Inhabitants of Old Faq

Inhabitants of New Faq

Current Inhabitants

Former Inhabitants

Known Units

Old Faq

New Faq


Main article: Erfworld Geography

Faq is located in the vicinity of the Kingdom of Transylvito and (in times past) near the Kingdom of Haffaton. Units of both of these Sides passed by Faq (although not seeing it) periodically.[12] It is located deep within the High Mountains, nearly impassible except for fliers and tunnelers.[13]

It is northeast of Carport of the Carpudlian side.[14]

Transylvito is to the south of Faq,[15] with Jitterati to the northwest and Gobwin Knob to the east.[16]


Former Cities

  • Faq -- Level 4, Capital. The city of Faq has unusual defenses, which seem specifically designed to defend against flying units. This means Faq is defensible against Dwagon and Archon attacks. -- Lost during the Transylvito-Faq war.
  • Otoh -- Level 2, farming -- Lost during the Transylvito-Faq war.
  • Kibo -- Level 2, farming -- Lost during the Transylvito-Faq war.

Brief Additions

Faq has briefly held a handful of other cities since Queen Jillian retook the throne. All of these acquisitions have been sacked.

Faq briefly held some Cities during the reign of King Banhammer, all of which were razed.

The Emerald City

During Haffaton's reign of terror, Faq was driven from its own Cities, but later laid claim to one of Haffaton's Capital Sites, reestablishing the Side.

City of Faq

Main Article: City of Faq

From LIAB Prologue 16:

"It was circular, sharp, and shining.
The outer walls looked impressive from a distance. But they were an afterthought, worse against a siege than Transylvito's. They consisted of a ring of stone teeth with a reflective coating of tin, inward-curving towers that terminated in sharp points, connected by a web of steel piping and sheeting. Inside, the whole city was geared up to defend against attack from above. Towers and buildings all had spiked metallic domes for roofs, looking like a forest of war mushrooms or something. There was no gate. Vinny simply flew between these pillars and entered the city. A horn somewhere announced him as an arriving allied unit.
The garrison was a set of six more teeth, much taller, fortified with solid walls that joined them like webbing. Three of these walls had gated archways, adorned with Gothic patterns in wrought iron and stone.
At the center of the garrison rose a tower constructed with all the ferocity of Jillian's imagination. It was shaped something like a white marble palm tree. The trunk was a twist of six massive columns, tapering slightly as they reached straight upward. The top of the tower was a miniature fortress, a bristle of glass and hard spikes, with ledges and platforms where many dozens of flyers could land, or hundreds of defenders could lurk."


The Peaceful Kingdom

For over a thousand turns, King Banhammer sought a peaceful, non-violent existence for his Kingdom, and so avoided combat that put his nation at risk. His strategy was to hide the existence and location of Faq from possible aggressors, making it a Bubble kingdom. At one point in Faq's history, prior to the establishment of Gobwin Knob and Jitterati, Faq was almost entirely surrounded by Haffaton, except for its southern border with Transylvito. Fortunately for Faq, neither Haffaton or Transylvito was aware of the existence of Faq at that time. King Banhammer relied heavily on the use of magic and in the later turns of his reign had multiple Casters, including a Chief Lookamancer, Brother Orwell, a Predictamancer (Marie Lavraie)[17], a Croakamancer (Wanda Firebaugh), a Foolamancer (Jack Snipe)[18], a Mathamancer with Flight ability, Adderall Hawk, a Healomancer, Sister Betsy Murgatroyd, a Signamancer, Brother Labeler, a Moneymancer, Moothfott, and a Shockmancer, Rusty Trombone.

When enemy units appeared nearby (usually passing through his territory unaware a nation existed there), Marie Lavraie was able to lay out the route the force would follow, allowing Jack to Veil one City at a time; thus, he managed to keep the location of Faq hidden until Wanda revealed the existence of Faq to Stanley. When King Banhammer was informed by Marie Lavraie that Faq would someday fall, his response was to pop his heir, Princess Jillian. Jillian was popped sometime before 625 BW.

Mercenary Work

Although the kingdom had mines and farms, King Banhammer found it necessary to send its units to do mercenary work, in order to supplement the treasury.[19] Jillian assumed command over these mercenaries after she had problems with King Banhammer.[20] Her employment as a mercenary provided her with combat experience that helped her become a 7th level Chief Warlord. At least some of those mercernaries of Faq met newly popped units at Mount Pilot.[21]

The First and Second Fall of Faq

Faq's existence was discovered by Haffaton, which succeeded in conquering Faq before itself being conquered by the Faqians. It was at this point that Wanda joined Faq.

After she joined Faq, Marie Lavraie gave Wanda a Prediction: that she would one day attune to an Arkentool. This would lead her to desperate measures in finding her destiny. She eventually learned of Stanley the Plaid, a Warlord in the service of King Saline IV at the time, who had attuned to the Arkenhammer. Thinking to take this Arkentool from him, she conspired with Stanley to bring him to Faq. Her intent was to see Stanley die in the attack on her side.[22] Her plan failed because Stanley unexpectedly acquired a large number of Dwagons during his journey from Gobwin Knob to Faq.[23] Because he had a far larger force than he'd originally planned to use, Stanley succeeded in destroying and pillaging Faq, temporarily ending the side. Wanda and Jack survived this disaster by agreeing to serve under Stanley, while Marie Lavraie became a Barbarian caster in the Magic Kingdom. At the time of Stanley's attack, Jillian and at least some of her mercenaries were in the field. Faq's fall turned Jillian and the troops with her into a Barbarian force.[24] Jillian's troops were later killed in battle with Witches[25] and Jillian remains the only known former Faq Unit that is not a caster.

The New Kingdom

The restored Kingdom of Faq has been profoundly influenced by each of the three main survivors on the Royal Side of the Battle of Gobwin Knob: Jillian, Charlie, and Vinny. Without Vinny's efforts to encourage cooperation between Jillian and Don King, it is unlikely that Transylvito would have provided the resources needed to first rebuild Faq and than rapidly expand its forces. Without the advice and financial support provided to Jillian by both Charlie and Transylvito, Faq could not have developed as it has. Between the three of them, these architects of Faq have a far better understanding of the personalities and abilities of the leaders of Gobwin Knob than anyone else on the Royal side. No one besides Charlie even begins to understand what Parson is capable of, and no one has the length of experience with both Wanda and Jack that Jillian has. As the magnitude of the threat posed by Gobwin Knob grows ever more apparent, the question of how Gobwin Knob can be stopped will be asked with greater and greater frequency. Natural Signamancy suggests that the answer will be found in Faq.

War in Jetstone

When a Gobwin Knob army led by Wanda and Ansom invades Jetstone in 75 AW, Jillian leads a Faqian force in Jetstone's defense. According to Ossomer,LIAB 10 Jillian's force includes:

Jillian's forces are significantly less powerful than Wanda's flying force of Dwagons and Archons. Instead of entering into a direct conflict with Wanda, Jillian changed the tactical situation in Jetstone's favor by having Vanna (while linked to Charlie), end Gobwin Knob's turn before Wanda could take advantage of her superior strength and position. Jillian then captured Ansom, (which made it easier for Jetstone to destroy Gobwin Knob's ground troops), before leaving to attack the cities held by Gobwin Knob which lay between Jetstone and Faq. She sacked Progrock, and thereby gained 40,000 Shmuckers, after capturing Stanley's living units and croaking Wanda's decrypted.

Reconstituted Livery of King Banhammer's Faq


Under Banhammer, the livery of Faq was green, Far Eastern styled clothing.

Under Jillian, the livery is now silver and white.

Natural Allies

Charlie gave Jillian the idea of making a deal between Faq and the Western Giants, who were allied with Jitterati. During Jillian's attack on Valdez, under the cover of a Parley, the Giants switched sides to Faq.

Given their willingness to change sides, Jillian may want to be careful, as this could cause problems later, since Parson or Charlie could offer them a new contract.

Western Giants are a perfect natural ally for Faq, as though they are heavies, they are Mountain-capable, and may be able to cross through the gap on their own.


From IPTSF Text 27 we know that Haffaton's Turn was before old Faq's, so Haffaton was older. From IPTSF Text 66 Haffaton was founded about eleven thousand turns ago. That gives a cap on the age of the old Faq itself.

Faq currently produces the same types of units which it formerly produced under King Banhammer. However, if Stanley rather than Jillian had rebuilt Faq, it would probably have produced the same units which were produced by Gobwin Knob. If Caesar had rebuilt Faq, it would probably have produced the same units as Transylvito.

Because Faq's terrain makes it well suited for defense, it may be that Don envisions Faq becoming a defensive fortress where he or his Royal Heir can survive, even if Stanley destroys Transylvito. Jillian and Don are still unaware that Stanley the Tool has a growing army of fliers that includes dwagons and archons that could threaten Transylvito. But since Stanley has attacked Transylvito in the past, Don King may believe he will attack again soon. If he decides that Transylvito is about to fall to Stanley, Don could conceivably adopt Stanley's escape plan, and send his Heir, with the remaining flying vampires, goyles, and doombats to Faq. Once there, they would become mercenaries, whom Jillian could hire.

Faqian Philosophy

Under King Banhammer, Faq was devoted to the study of philosophy. Erf-b1-p082Same-site.PNG There may have been a correlation between the names of the towns and the style of philosophy practiced there. Philosophers in the capital sought to answer Frequently Asked Questions. Philosophers in Kibo were very critical of other philosopher's reasoning, deriding it as Knowledge In, Boop Out. Philosophers in Otoh, On The Other Hand, saw value on the arguments of both Faq and Kibo.

In the future, Faqian philosophy may develop in directions pleasing to Queen Jillian. For example, both the institution of Royalty and the Arkentools were created by the Titans. This suggests they may both have a role to play in the Titan's Plan. According to this line of reasoning, Stanley's great crime is to attempt to use one aspect of the Titan's Plan, the Arkentools, to destroy another aspect, Royalty. The rejection of the Arkentools by the members of the Royal Crown Coalition is equally objectionable. Jillian's efforts to combine the powers of Royalty and the Arkentools, by allying with Charlie, and possibly by attempting to persuade Wanda to return to Faq with the Arkenpliers, could represent the true will of the Titans.

Natural Allies

Faq could be attacked by ground units through a system of Tunnels. They would benefit from a force of tunnel fighters. Two possible types of unit which could fill these roles are Marbits and Gobwins. Given the problems Stanley is having finding Gobwins, it's possible that Charlie has helped Jillian forge an alliance with the Gobwins. There has been no reference to such an arrangement as yet, however. Parson has noted an unusual number of Marbits in the absence of the Gobwins which may indicate that Charlie has employed Marbits as his own Natural Allies and is using them to wipe out the randomly popping Gobwin tribes before Gobwin Knob can find and recruit them. Whether he would be doing that to help Faq or just to undermine Gobwin Knob is purely speculative.

Real World References

  • The name is a pun on FAQ.

There are a lot of Frequently Asked Questions about Erfworld; fortunately, there have been many answers, or the name wouldn't work out too well.

  • Faq is also a pun on "The Eternal Questions," such as 'Who am I?', 'What do I want?', 'What is my purpose for being?', 'Is there an afterlife?', 'What is my role in society?', etc.
  • Western Giants seem to be based on the San Francisco Giants baseball team.
  • Faq's ensign is similar to that of Indonesia's national airline, Garuda Indonesia.

See Also


  1. ^  TBFGK_147:4
  2. ^  LIAB Prologue 16
  3. ^  ibid
  4. ^  LIAB Prologue 28
  5. ^  citation needed
  6. ^  TBFGK_147:4
  7. ^  LIAB Prologue 28
  8. ^  TBFGK_82:1
  9. ^  citation needed
  10. ^  TBFGK_99:7
  11. ^  LIAB Prologue 20
  12. ^  TBFGK_107:6 and IPTSF Text 28
  13. ^  TBFGK_99:7
  14. ^  TBFGK Epilogue 11 - From the Faq Gap to Carport is southwest, so Faq must be northeast of it.
  15. ^  IPTSF Text 28
  16. ^  TBFGK Epilogue 19
  17. ^  TBFGK_82:9
  18. ^  TBFGK_107:6
  19. ^  TBFGK_82:6
  20. ^  citation needed
  21. ^  IPTSF Text 29
  22. ^  TBFGK_147
  23. ^  LIAB_Text_27
  24. ^  TBFGK_83:1
  25. ^  LIAB Prologue 20