Hvs.tCF 28

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Book (Hvs.tCF)
Page by page (28)
Panel by panel (28:1)

Page Info [edit]

Turn Number:79 AW
Side's Turn:Gobwin Knob

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Hvs.tCF 28.jpg
Hvs.tCF 29.jpg

Panels: 3
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Panel 1

A hex-grid map of part of Erfworld. Included is the level 3 city of Orgchart and the level 0 city site Bohica. The hexes are colored differently, indicating terrain. A hex east of Orgchart is highlighted.[edit]

Orgchart: 3

Strength Index

Faq Gobwin
Leadership 56 66
Unit Power 185 231
Bonuses 38 68
Penalties -35 -20
Total 244 345
Odds 18.1% 81.9%
Bohica: 0

Panel 2


(Eyebook) LordHamster: So is that your offer? Full reimbursement for our lost cities and troops if we let her go?

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: That's an offer. How much is it, exactly?

(Eyebook) LordHamster: Bracer says $221,540 if we get our remaining prisoners back.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: I can't make deals for Faq, but I'll make sure she lets your people go.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: And the figure doesn't bother you.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: It's steep, but I can pay it.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: Okay, "my people" are saying nfw.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: And I'm thinking no, too. Just because this is something you want. :P

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: *sigh*

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: Parson... I want her for reasons that don't have anything to do with you.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: If that offer doesn't interest you, then name something that does.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: How bout you give you up the calculations I owe you[1]? All of them.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: Done.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: And tell me what Jojo's spell[2] does.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: I already have. It sends you home.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: No, I want a full technical explanation.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: Who created it, why, and what are its specifications? It's "underpinnings."

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: Done. What else?

(Eyebook) LordHamster: Get us our Archon prisoner back from Jetstone.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: I said I can't make deals for other sides. Jetstone won't even talk to me. Name something else.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: Tell me why you want the Queen so bad.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: I mean, you're not even saying "take her prisoner and hand her over," you still want her to be running her side. Why?

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: To fulfill another contractual obligation that doesn't concern you.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: It does concern me. Faq is an enemy side.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: I mean, the alternative is we eliminate Faq this turn and make up our losses by razing their cities. Right?

(Eyebook) LordHamster: That sounds a lot more strategically solid, actually.

Panel 3


(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: Let me tell you why it's not.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: I've got a bunch of carrots to offer you. But you're not interested. So fine, let's talk about sticks.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: Your Overlord is alone in the field right now. In the air.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: How's your air power looking these days?

(Eyebook) LordHamster: He can get home.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: Are you ready to bet your side on that?

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: Who are you talking to right now?

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: Who am I? What do I do for a living?

(Eyebook) LordHamster: lookout.jpg[3]

(Eyebook) LordHamster: Charlie, if you really thought you could kill Stanley, you'd just do it. You would end my side. Win.

(Eyebook) LordHamster: You wouldn't be pitching me a deal at all, let alone this "name your own price at Priceline" crap.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: All you can infer from that is that I have higher priorities than my war with you.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: But if you mess those up for me, then you'll jump to the top of my list.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: You don't ever want to be at the top of my list, Parson.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: If you make peace with me, then Stanley can go home. Or to Spacerock, or wherever else he feels like.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: If not? Then I promise he will die, Gobwin Knob will fall, and I will take the Arkenhammer.

(Eyebook) CharlsNChrg: iguaranteeit.jpg[4]


  • ^ Calculations  Parson sold Charlie 12 calculations during The Battle for Gobwin Knob, and has used 6 of them over the course of the last two books.
  • ^ Jojo's Spell  While running through a tunnel to the battle at Spacerock, Parson was stopped by Jojo Jeftichew and given a scroll that "would send him home." LIAB 64 Charlie tried to force him to use it when the city became an inferno. LIAB 108
  • ^ lookout.jpg  Neil deGrasse Tyson, noted astrophysicist, is associated with the phrase/meme "watch out, we're dealing with a badass over here." Why? It's the internet. (outside citation: know your meme)
  • ^ iguaranteeit.jpg  George Zimmer, founder and spokesman for the Men's Wearhouse clothing chain, would use the slogan "You're going to like the way you look. I guarantee it." in nearly 30 years of commercials.