Charlescomm redirects here. For other uses, see Charlescomm (disambiguation)
- 1 Proposed Canon
- 2 Speculation
- 3 Real World References
- 4 Citations
'Your battlespace solutions provider'
Mission Statement: Team members will integrate core competencies utilizing best practices to achieve total battlespace saturation, and to provide just-in-time client solutions.
Charlescomm is an Erfworld side led by the mysterious Charlie. Its capital, which goes by the same name, is a level 5 mountaintop city clad in blue, topped by the ominous Arkendish, and is reputed to be invincible. Its forces include about 600 archons, some 120 of which presently guard the city along with over 700 golems (mostly cloth). Charlescomm has no other cities and uses no other units; no infantry, no casters, and no warlords. At the time of the Battle for Gobwin Knob, Charlie had deployed some 480 archons across Erfworld, either in the employ of various clients or simply remaining on standby near hotspots.
Charlescomm sells the services of its units as mercenaries, even those of its Ruler (only those available remotely). It deals in anything of value, and does not operate on cash-only policies. Although Charlie (the primary dealmaker of Charlescomm, as well as its Ruler) will consider any offer, his reputation as a reliable mercenary is important to him, so Charlescomm will normally not change Sides in a conflict.
Services known to be offered by Charlie himself include contract Thinkamancy and manipulation of employers. The Archons, Charlescomm's primary off-site consulting Unit, can provide significant combat casting abilities based on Shockmancy and/or Thinkamancy, and Foolamancy as well as a range of other services such as spell security. Clients choose which services they wish the Archons to provide. Archons interpret contracts themselves, and have on occasion provided more than the client contracted, but this must not be relied upon since it is up to each Archon to decide whether to go beyond the scope of the contract. Charlie will also hire casters from the Magic Kingdom as contractors for specific jobs.
Charlescomm is very probably the wealthiest side in Erfworld. As of the Battle for Castle Lilith, Charlescomm had 166,509,971 shmuckers in the treasury and 530,454,000 saved up in gems. Shortly after that, Operation: Big Game cost them 30 million shmuckers, which itself is considered an unheard-of amount of money by most sides.
Charlescomm has a large supply of weapons that are generally obscure to Erfworld, including grenades and guns. These weapons were kept a secret from all but a handful of archons and allied barbarian casters until Charlescomm and Gobwin Knob entered open war.
Charlescomm only consists of a single city, but it maintains a very large buffer zone. This buffer zone borders Gobwin Knob and is also close to Faq and Jitterati. Every city site within a hundred hexes of Charlescomm has been razed.Erf-b3-p250
It also has a total of 11 farms.
- City of Charlescomm (Capital)
For a list of known rules, see Charlie's Rules
- FF or FFF: Fox Force (formerly Fox Force Five) is his inner circle, and the only archons permitted in Charlie's physical presence. They coordinate communications with other sides and issue orders to the lower ranks.
- AAA: highest non-FF rank, giving orders to AA and A units.
- AA: leading stacks of A units.
- A: the lowest rank seen, although lower ranked (or unranked) units may also exist.
- Vurp, top level Hobgobwin Knight, Chief of the allied Hobgobwins. Formerly in service to Gobwin Knob but betrayed them to Charlescomm after some coercion.
- Ginger, croaked by Volcano Uncroaking, decrypted, destroyed in the Siege of Spacerock.
- Hilary, prisoner of Haggar, ultimate fate unknown.
- Jaclyn, croaked by Gobwin Knob's air defenses, uncroaked, ultimately destroyed.
- LaVerne, croaked by Volcano Uncroaking, decrypted, destroyed in the Siege of Spacerock.
- MaryAnn, croaked by Volcano Uncroaking, decrypted, destroyed in the Siege of Spacerock.
- Maxene, croaked by Volcano Uncroaking, decrypted, destroyed in the Siege of Spacerock.
- Norma Jean, croaked by Volcano Uncroaking, decrypted, destroyed in the Siege of Spacerock.
- Patty, croaked by Volcano Uncroaking, decrypted, destroyed in the Siege of Spacerock.
- Belle, Fox Forcer, croaked by Lilith's Shockmancy.
- Fifinella, Fox Forcer, croaked by Lilith with a stolen rifle.
- Daisy Mae, croaked in the Magic Kingdom by Bonnie from a single bullet, uncroaked by Magic Kingdom croakamancers
- Dinah Might, AA, croaked in the Magic Kingdom by Sandy, uncroaked by Magic Kingdom croakamancers
- Enola, croaked in the Magic Kingdom, uncroaked by Magic Kingdom croakamancers
- Lizzie, croaked in the Magic Kingdom, uncroaked by Magic Kingdom croakamancers
- Shirley Ann, croaked in the Magic Kingdom, uncroaked by Magic Kingdom croakamancers
- Tondelayo, Fox Forcer, deceased, her strings were sliced by Isaac
Former Charlescomm Units currently belonging to Gobwin Knob
- Parson Gotti, Warlord, received from Gobwin Knob as a claim over contract violations and lost when contract violations on Charlescomm's part made it possible for him to turn back. Currently in Transylvito
- Bonnie, level 9, AAA croaked trying to recover the body of a fallen comrade a little too slowly, decrypted, currently in Spacerock
- Lilith, croaked by Volcano Uncroaking, decrypted, currently a prisoner in Magic Kingdom
- Sandy, AA, croaked by anti-aircraft fire while invading the Magic Kingdom, decrypted, currently a prisoner in Magic Kingdom
- Raven, A, croaked in the Magic Kingdom, decrypted, currently a prisoner in Magic Kingdom
- Claud Gauntlet, Dollamancer, croaked, decrypted, currently in the bedrock
- Ivan Poe, Dirtamancer, croaked, decrypted, currently in the bedrock
- Gobwins - Bribed by Charlescomm to work against Gobwin Knob instead of for them again. Charlie says they are thriving and provide his best natural allies.
- Hobgobwins - By using a spell called binding arbitration, Charlie was able to weaken Vurp's willpower and coerce him into betraying Gobwin Knob.
- High Elves - Were hired by Charlescomm to betray Haffaton due to discontent over how much Haffaton was paying them. He had them burn the Olive Garden and politely "guard" the Faq units inside the city of el-Efbaum until they agreed to his deal. It is unlikely they still work for him, since Gobwin and elf allies are normally mutually exclusive.
At least part of Charlescomm's power derives from Charlie's possession of and attunement to the Arkendish - how powerful this faction would be without such a significant artifact in their possession is unlikely to be revealed.
Charlescomm only pops archons, but has a large number of golems. Unless they all existed prior to the Archons, they were likely created by Archons with Dollamancy or contracted with casters from the magic kingdom.
Relations with other Sides
Lord Stanley, Overlord of Gobwin Knob, seems to hate Charles for personal reasons. It's not clear at first whether Charlie reciprocates this hatred, though he eventually informs Queen Jillian that croaking Stanley would be a good start for both of them. Before she rebuilt Faq, Jillian considered Charlescomm to be her major competitor as a mercenary. When she first became Queen, Jillian was the only known member of the second Royal Crown Coalition willing to work with Charlie. Prince Tramennis of Jetstone is willing to deal with Charlie, and it is on Tramennis's advice that King Slately eventually works with Charlescomm. However, Tramennis becomes distrustful of the side after Charlie's plan to kill Parson (at great expense to Jetsone) fails.
Charlescomm in the First Royal Crown Coalition
Charlescomm provided 15 Archons to the Coalition.
Charlescomm in Gobwin Knob Airspace
Charlie sent at least 30 Archons to Gobwin Knob Airspace in the turn of the Volcano Uncroaking. Of these, 28 were decrypted to Gobwin Knob's side. All of these have since been re-croaked and turned to dust except Lilith.
Charlescomm is styled very much like a corporation while most sides are styled as nations. In addition Charlescomm seems to be heavily dependent upon trade with other sides, as opposed to producing for its own consumption. Both Charlie and his Archons tend to use "corporate-speak".
Charlescomm is not a Royal side and is tolerated, but not accepted, by Royals. This may be a parallel to the real world conflict that occurred between the declining nobles classes and the rising business classes. The business model seems to be based on management consulting companies such as Bain & Co. or McKinsey & Co., where high level services are provided for exorbitant prices. Like Bain or McKinsey, Chalescomm finds no moral dilemma when working simultaneously for competing sides.
We know that Charlescomm's capital can produce 1 archon/turn (or 1.5 with a Turnamancer), and that other cities could pop archons over several turns. This might mean other sides can pop archons, or it could mean that either Charlescomm once had other cities but abandoned them because they were inefficient and unnecessary to the success of the side, or that Charlie can somehow see the production ability of foreign cities.
Based on the other two known rules, the corollary to #19 may be along the lines of "Charlie's rules may be bent but not broken."
Real World References
The name Charlescomm and the many corporate buzzwords used are references to modern businesses, specifically Internet-based "dot coms".
A, AA, and AAA are references to the tiers of Minor League Baseball.
- ^ Field Deployment - LIAB Prologue 25
- ^ Non-cash Payments - Implied by Charlie's acceptance of Parson's services (in the form of the Bracer Calculations), although nothing has shown that it was a typical exchange and not an exception to his usual practices.
- ^ Reputation for Reliability - TBFGK_90:7
- ^ Employer Manipulation - citation needed
- ^ Contracting in the Magic Kingdom - LIAB Prologue 25