Book 1/Page 15/Transcript

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Parson Gotti: A marshmallow peep.

One of the great seasonal treats of this time of year.

Ross: Dude. It's July.[1]

Parson Gotti: Exactly. Peeps are one of the small number of foods which are better stale.

They start to get crispy in a few days. By July, they're solidly crunchy.

Sound: SNAP

Ross: Ah.

Like the "marshmallows" in Lucky Charms...I never realized they're crunchy because they're stale.

Parson Gotti: Technically, those are called "marbits,[2]" short for "marshmallow bits."

You're behind on your scientific literature.

Ross: Okay, "marbits."

But... When you leave out a box and those go stale, they get soft. What is that?

Parson Gotti: Quantum staleness.

They're working on a supercomputer. Instead of bits, or qbits? It uses marbits.


Ross: They're here.

Parson Gotti: Showtime.

Parson Gotti: Gentlemen.


Let's do the thing.

Tonight we begin the first beta test of a turn-based strategy game I have been preparing for five solid months.

Parson Gotti: You are about to command armies in a desperate final struggle for survival...

between all that is noble and decent... and all that is vile and unholy, not to mention unspeakable.

Parson's Friend: Unspeakable?

Parson Gotti: I said not to mention unspeakable.

Parson's Friend: Damn, Parson...